light battles

This morning we left the house just a few minutes early. As we pulled out of the driveway I looked up and saw a waning moon shining down. From behind me slowly creeping over the horizon came the pinks and reds of sunrise. Simultaneously these two beautiful lights filled the sky, each glowing as one began it's resignation to the other. Then the clouds got into the act as they surrounded the sun, only the glow was evident suppressed by thickness...for over twenty minutes the battle raged. When I exited the scene the moon glowed on, though somewhat diminished, the sun still battling for its rightful position.

I have felt that way in my heart this week. It is more than a transition in life, it is a spiritual transition as well. Since the unexpected blindsiding of emotion Sunday and the constant desire to quell and push it away moment by moment as I feel it rising to the surface, comes that 'not quite there' fresh new life. It has not apparently arrived...not risen to its place as if held back or covered with a cloud mass that won't allow its rays to warm and illuminate. Spurred on by the encouragement of my friends, I try to see the coming light, searching diligently within my heart...damn the moon and well meaning clouds.

And so I wait. Wait for the Father to part the sky...to reprimand the moon and slap the clouds. Joy comes in the morning...but on mornings like this, patience is a virtue I long to possess.